A History Lesson

Hello and welcome, fellow Grinders!! Everyone knows, the MFGCPSs are a pretty tight-knit crew, and we have been laid back since the days of the eight track, and that's all well and good. For newer members, however, or anyone considering applying, trying to catch up on all the back history could be quite daunting. Therefore, Harry Pizzle is going to begin detailing adventures past, for the benefit of those who have forgotten or were never present to witness such shenanigans.

We begin our olde tyme storye in the days of yore, when players were bad, store owners hated their customers and let them know it frequently, and there was this guy called Dr. Teeth. Now, Dr. Teeth was a monster, in the best way possible. He was some special kind of badass. Dr. Teeth would take your lunch money, steal your woman, jack your ride, and leave you asking for a replay, because that's just how s to the ick he was. If you are unfamiliar, here is Dr Teeth in all his glory: http://www.cardshark.com/images_magic/31825.jpg
Dr Teeth didn't need many friends- mostly just counterspells and cool acronyms, because he tended to eat any other friends he had around. 'Sure, I could have a buddy, or I could have a MEAL! NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!' went his thought process, and who was to argue? So blue mages (this was back when blue mages existed, without being laughed at) who would enlist the good Dr's services would have no need to enlist the services of others- a victory was assured when two or three Drs got together, so the mages of the day would rarely ask for more.
* * *
Jeremy was a jerk. He would beat down the little kids without mercy, wouldn't pay back debts, and was arrogant to the point he'd make yours truly look like jam without a backpack. On this particular evening, he was being worse than usual and playing games against everyone with his new deck, featuring Dr Teeth front and center. He was not losing. Something had to be done.
* * *
As the evening wore on, Harry Pizzle 5784 watched, and waited. I knew eventually he would make a mistake. When he left his deck on the table while he went to the bathroom, I knew opportunity was knocking. I could feel the hand of fate upon my shoulder, guiding me forward, and I knew what I had to do. With lightning quick reflexes honed by hours of just sitting there, I grabbed his deck and removed the three good Dr.s from his el decko. He was now without a victory condition. lols.
* * *
When he returned, Jeremy continued to do battle, never suspecting his deck was short staffed. He would counter a bunch of spells, kill a bunch of dudes, and draw a bunch of cards, and then lose. For those of us watching, it was something quite similar to hilarious. Jeremy was continuing to talk smack the whole way though the game, and would finally lose the grizzly bears.dec, because he couldn't draw a way to make the other guy not be alive anymore. Everyone in the store was in on the joke, except him, and we were all laughing away. Good times.
* * *
It couldn't last. Eventually this other cool cat by the name of Jay S. (more on him later) entered the arena, and wanted to know what was crack-a-lackin'. When showed the Teeth in my hand, however, he pulled a regular HP-SS backstabbing scenario, and gave them back to Jeremy. Suddenly, J-Dawg understood why he had not been winning for the last hour. Hilarity ensued. Well, hilarity and HP 1259 being chased out of the store and around the parking lot, anyway.

Its harder to pull a good caper like that these days. Partly people are being forced to have more than three cards in their decks that win the game for them and part of it is that everyone does more pile shuffling now than they did back in the days I was just an apprentice mage. Mostly though, everyone just plain seems less trusting.
I hope you enjoyed this history lesson, Grinders. If you'd like to see more, just remember to mention to the Dutch Rudder that his sister is easy on the eyes, even if he does have dibs, and I'll get the message.



This is Harry Potter7861, signing off.
Don't forget to go to a college bar and beat up the smart kids.