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I am still working on the promised

Maximum Tape

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Recently I've been down with the sickness, some kind of anti-hustle plague what was formulated in a terrorist lab somewhere in the gods forsaken desert. after drinking countless gallons of light emitting fluids i am back in the update saddle, and boy do we have some updates for you.

Saint Patrick's Day, a brief history.

Saint Patrick's Day or SPD, is a holiday to ironically celebrate a man named Patrick Saint.
Pat's legend is an astounding tale of  how the village idiot of a small Irish township caused the Great Snake Blight of Ireland. Being a drunken fool Patrick had no job and spent most of his days playing panpipes, on one fateful spring day Pat discovered that the snakes of the land would dance to his music and follow him about, his song attracted more and more snakes and this scared poor Pat. The sacred Patrick ran as fast as he could until he reached the very edge of Ireland, afraid that the snakes would overtake him Patrick marched into the ocean where the snakes all drowned. Now this was a sad day, for back in the day snakes were Ireland's chief export, and Pat's escapade doomed all of Ireland to be poor. Saint Patrick's Day is celebrated now by burning Patrick in effigy, and drinking to forget the day that Patrick killed all those poor dancing snakes.

Histor-izzle

Welcome back to class, suckers! Harry Pizzle's going to fill you in on another oft-mentioned tale of GrindCity shenanigans- don't be the only one in the room to not know.

This story starts with a barrel shaped GC affiliate, by the name of Josh. Some have described him as the worst good player in town, others have called him the best bad player, but everyone agrees that he is shaped like a barrel. Tell your friends. Whether he's at the top of the bottom or the bottom of the top, it is clear he misplays himself out of a game or two from time to time. Sometimes, it can be seen from a mile off that he is moving in that direction; our tale concerns one of these occasions. Josh was attempting to pilot The Blue Menace (Faeries) against I forget who. Like a fat person's legs, it doesn't matter. He had a Vendilion Clique in play. For the uneducated amongst you, the V. Clique gets its Legend Status on like DJ Jazzy Jeff's accomplice (think about it, discuss in the forums).
Also in the mix is Sexy Chubs. Sexy Chubs is watching from afar, with his sights on Josh, waiting to pull the trigger.
As the game goes on, Josh continues playing stuff, and Sexy keeps circling overhead, a hawk ready to strike.
The world turns, jam fills backpacks, and still Sexy watches.
An Age passes. Sexy waits...
Josh casts Vendilion Clique...
And finally, in that moment of weakness, SEXY CHUBS STRIKES!!!!
Sexy comes running across the room, shoving people out of his way as he rushes to the scene of the misplay. His terrible war cry was heard the magic playing world over, and yet turns the blood of experienced mages cold when they recall his chant of "LEGEND RULE!!!!!!!!11!!!1!!"
Josh had forgotten his Cliques were legendary, and had played a second one while the first was still in play, causing them both to die- but he hadn't realized it yet. He looked up, his face frozen in horror, and paused to try to figure out why Sexy was running at full speed towards him. (You'd freeze if you saw that too. I promise.)
"Legend Rule!!!" repeated Sexy Chubs as he continued maneuvering towards the game, frozen in place like a train behind Comic Book Guy. Arriving at the table, Sexy Chubs picked up the V. Clique in play and yanked the second one from Mr. Barrel's hand, and slapped them into the graveyard, laughing all the while.

Josh lost the game.

Love to continue filling you in, you Mighty Fighty folks you, but I'm afraid that's all for Harry Potter 7015 today- I have to get back to other deeds. After all, Ryan's sister isn't going to seduce herself.

A History Lesson

Hello and welcome, fellow Grinders!! Everyone knows, the MFGCPSs are a pretty tight-knit crew, and we have been laid back since the days of the eight track, and that's all well and good. For newer members, however, or anyone considering applying, trying to catch up on all the back history could be quite daunting. Therefore, Harry Pizzle is going to begin detailing adventures past, for the benefit of those who have forgotten or were never present to witness such shenanigans.

We begin our olde tyme storye in the days of yore, when players were bad, store owners hated their customers and let them know it frequently, and there was this guy called Dr. Teeth. Now, Dr. Teeth was a monster, in the best way possible. He was some special kind of badass. Dr. Teeth would take your lunch money, steal your woman, jack your ride, and leave you asking for a replay, because that's just how s to the ick he was. If you are unfamiliar, here is Dr Teeth in all his glory: http://www.cardshark.com/images_magic/31825.jpg
Dr Teeth didn't need many friends- mostly just counterspells and cool acronyms, because he tended to eat any other friends he had around. 'Sure, I could have a buddy, or I could have a MEAL! NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!' went his thought process, and who was to argue? So blue mages (this was back when blue mages existed, without being laughed at) who would enlist the good Dr's services would have no need to enlist the services of others- a victory was assured when two or three Drs got together, so the mages of the day would rarely ask for more.
* * *
Jeremy was a jerk. He would beat down the little kids without mercy, wouldn't pay back debts, and was arrogant to the point he'd make yours truly look like jam without a backpack. On this particular evening, he was being worse than usual and playing games against everyone with his new deck, featuring Dr Teeth front and center. He was not losing. Something had to be done.
* * *
As the evening wore on, Harry Pizzle 5784 watched, and waited. I knew eventually he would make a mistake. When he left his deck on the table while he went to the bathroom, I knew opportunity was knocking. I could feel the hand of fate upon my shoulder, guiding me forward, and I knew what I had to do. With lightning quick reflexes honed by hours of just sitting there, I grabbed his deck and removed the three good Dr.s from his el decko. He was now without a victory condition. lols.
* * *
When he returned, Jeremy continued to do battle, never suspecting his deck was short staffed. He would counter a bunch of spells, kill a bunch of dudes, and draw a bunch of cards, and then lose. For those of us watching, it was something quite similar to hilarious. Jeremy was continuing to talk smack the whole way though the game, and would finally lose the grizzly bears.dec, because he couldn't draw a way to make the other guy not be alive anymore. Everyone in the store was in on the joke, except him, and we were all laughing away. Good times.
* * *
It couldn't last. Eventually this other cool cat by the name of Jay S. (more on him later) entered the arena, and wanted to know what was crack-a-lackin'. When showed the Teeth in my hand, however, he pulled a regular HP-SS backstabbing scenario, and gave them back to Jeremy. Suddenly, J-Dawg understood why he had not been winning for the last hour. Hilarity ensued. Well, hilarity and HP 1259 being chased out of the store and around the parking lot, anyway.

Its harder to pull a good caper like that these days. Partly people are being forced to have more than three cards in their decks that win the game for them and part of it is that everyone does more pile shuffling now than they did back in the days I was just an apprentice mage. Mostly though, everyone just plain seems less trusting.
I hope you enjoyed this history lesson, Grinders. If you'd like to see more, just remember to mention to the Dutch Rudder that his sister is easy on the eyes, even if he does have dibs, and I'll get the message.



This is Harry Potter7861, signing off.
Don't forget to go to a college bar and beat up the smart kids.

this just in!

Vader was framed. Spread the word.

Whoa Nelly

Santa Clause has got BBQ sauce in his drawers.
More news at 11:00

SNAX xx MAD

My doublerad sister surprised me with a custom MAD sharpist for my birthday. if any of y'all want

to get me gifts there is a Wishlist
via my profile.

also, i'd like to recommended to my fellow bloggers to 

set up Wishlists.

Scrubbing out...backwards

Yo dawgs, yo, let me hollar at chu! Harry Pizzle is back on that ass with a mighty fighty fine tourney report for y'alls.

El BeginningO
The mystery begins on Friday morning, when we're scheduled to roll out. Big Willy is slated to pick up your boy, but when the knock comes, he pulled a fast one and was really Questionable Snax. Seemed they pulled a Houdini on me. We head out, and quickly assemble at El Casa del Willy. We waste no time high-tailing it out to Hastings, where we begin loitering as hard as we can. Maintaining a respectful distance from the local garden, where a king of dogs has taken up residence, we are pleasantly surprised by the arrival of dancing girls. Sometimes, the jam just puts itself in the backpack, I guess. After their unfortunate departure, we agree to upgrade Sandbag into the King of Dogs for the trip.

Finally, the Dutch Rudder arrives and we pile into the WobbleCar to pick up Sandbag. Our love for the King of Dogs was unrequited, so Sandbag will have to do. After scooping him up, we have to go to Snax's pad, as he forgot his bread. Never could he leave town without it, and never would we ask him to. That's not how fellow GrindCity-ers get down.

As we get out of B-Town, the WobbleCar drops its disguise and reveals itself. For those of us that have driven with the Jay S.s and the Josh M.s of the world before, this is a super upgrade. Sandbag and Dutch, however, are fazed at best. About this time it is agreed that shitting oneself is the man equivalent of womanish crying.

The First
Having mastered the WobbleCar, we are making good time Southwards. The scenery is flying past, the ridiculous mashups are playing, and all is well in the world. Then Dutch decides to kill us all. He claims to have seen some snow boobs that caught his attention, but none of the rest of us saw them, so we're pretty sure he's on crack. While distracted, he continues going straight while the road curves right, and we show the shoulder who's boss. The LEFT shoulder of the road, that is. Yeah.

The Store
As we're pulling into some village or other, we decide to stop and check the local store for treasure. Snax has the name, but not the location of this arena of battle, so he gives them a call to see what's what. They tell him to go towards the mountains, and he decides this is enough information, and hangs up. Snax 0, Not Snax 1. I give the dude a call myself, and he says the address is 42. We're on the 4000 block, and getting higher, so we have a ways to go. Upon arrival where 42 ought to be, we see nothing. Life, the Universe, and Everything my ass. Dutchy hollars back at the store, and this time dude says its 4200, so we get to turn around again. Awesome. We finally make it to the place to be, only to find out its anything but the place to be. Fail.

The Store, part two
We get directions to another store, hit it up, and the rapeage begins. Solid.

Casa
We eventually make it to Dutch's pad, where we stop, drop, shut 'em down and open up shop. Thats how GCers roll. We top the Albino Rhino's record of providing three beautiful garages, as we find there are FOUR beautiful garages waiting for us. Ding, Lightning Round! Also, he has a wicked hot sister. Make sure you mention that to him- he likes to hear about it.
Breakfast is provided, is awesome.

The tournament
Harry Pizzle does some winning, the rest of the crew drag down his team average. Unfortunate.

Oh, and somewhere in there Snax decides to kill us all too.

There you have it folks- another weekend, more shenanigans, and the Grind City Crew continues to jam jam in backpacks.

Harry Pizzle 7639, signing off.

Risking the Curse had best be worth It

I've doing some digging for my tupac article, and the more i dig the stranger things get.
i may have to get some backup from my fellow grinders, so this might take longer than originally planned.
we'll keep at this and get it posted as soon as possible.

hopefully all this witches brewpac doesn't BLOW MY MIND.

GCN "We Scrub out in style!"

Sorry for the mini-updates this weekend, we were too cool to setup our twitter right proper before the denver escapade,we have it in line now though. we have a few of our photos up on the flickr now, and there will be some things written to explain them. HP2099 hit top eight, and the rest of us were straight busters in a bad way.
plus i slam jammed ChillWill in round two taking a fellow MFGCP out of the running, i never thought that beating zoo would hurt so bad.